Matthew Monday #1

Yay! I am so excited to be starting a new series on this blog. Matthew has been teaching me so much the last couple months and it has been good to not have a certain Bible study or book that I am reading or participating in, but simply relying on God's word to speak into my life.

This week I am going to focus on Matthew 5:1-12. I am going to basically retype everything that is in my journal, with some much needed editing. But what you see is basically how I go through my study. This passage has so much that we can all take from it, but while doing the study the first part of the verse "poor in spirit" is what struck me the hardest so that is what I am focusing on. I am not ignoring the rest, just sharing where my heart was on that day. Without anymore rambling here you go!:

Matthew 5:1-12

What?

Blessed are:
-The poor in spirit
-Those who mourn
-The meek
-Those who hunger and thirst for righteousness
-The merciful
-Pure in heart
-The peacemakers
-Who are persecuted because of their rigtheousness

Because:
-Theirs is the kingdom of heaven
-They will be comforted
-They will inherit the earth
-They will be filled
-Shown mercy
-They will see God
-They will be called the children of God

-Be happy and joyful because your reward is heaven, not on this earth.

So what?

-You're blessed when you're at the end of your rope. With less of you there is more of God and his rule.
-You're blessed when you feel you've lost what is most dear to you. Only then can you be embraced by the One most dear to you.
-You're blessed when you're content with just who you are—no more, no less.
-You're blessed when you've worked up a good appetite for God. He's food and drink in the best meal you'll ever eat. AKA The Holy Spirit
-You're blessed when you care. At the moment of being 'care-full,' you find yourselves cared for.
-You're blessed when you get your mind and heart are right. Then you can see God in the outside world.
-You're blessed when you can show people how to cooperate.
-You're blessed when your commitment to God causes persecution. The persecution drives you even deeper into God's kingdom.

Now what?

If I am not completely poor in spirit and completely relying on Him, I am ultimately going to fail at everything. Seeds of doubt and insecurity will ruin my life. With God as my watering hole I will be filled with confidence and hope that I am the person He has created me to be.

This is so apparent in my role as a wife. Being a "good" wife, let alone an "exceptional" wife is something that has been the hardest thing I have ever done. I fail on a daily basis. The more and more I try the more and more I fail. It is a horrible cycle that has brought me to tears, sometimes daily. When I got married I had visions of being the perfect wife and I have not lived up to my own expectations. But through reading this awesome post and these verses, I have realized that even in 30 years I will still not live up to my own earthly expectations of being a good wife. It is only when I completely empty myself, become poor in spirit and allow God to fill me and take control of my marriage and life, will I be able to see the kind of wife God designed me to be for my Jamaican Sprinter. And that is what I want.