Day 19. Write about your favorite comfort food (we are women- we ALL have comfort food!)

Today AA and I set out to run 7 miles. We both wanted flat and non windy. Well we got one of those. We went to Greenlake to run 2.5 laps of flat flatness. It was windy but sunny so we couldn't complain too much. We saw friends and co-workers and probably spent way too much energy dodging people and little ones. And when you are over 6' tall like AA and I are, little ones....aka kids....get lost in our vision. So to say we almost trampled a hand full of them would be an understatement. But we finished and are on our way to 13.1. Oh and PS...I didn't have to stop....WOOT WOOT!
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Okay on to today's question....comfort food. And since I have been doing such a good job of writing letters I am going to write a letter to my comfort food. I hope you enjoy!

Dearest Ben & Jerry's Smores Ice Cream,

I love you. I mean I REALLY love you. If I could eat a carton of you every night I would. You are the yummiest, most assessable ice cream I have ever tasted. I love you Ben & Jerry's Smores ice cream, but my butt does not. No, she just doesn't like the jiggle or girth that you add. I know....how dare her! And come to think of it my love handles aren't too fond of you either. They want to disappear but you are right there to make sure they don't. It just shows the love you have for them. And you know what I say Ben and Jerry's Smores Ice Cream....SCREW 'EM! Let my butt jiggle and let my love handle stand out, because you make me oh so happy. Thanks for looking out for my sanity instead of parts of my body. Where would I be without you? I am now going to induce myself with a ice cream comma.

Over and Out,

Your stalker.

Day 18. Describe your personality.

SUN!!! People...sun again! THANK YOU JESUS!

No running today, too busy running around with my fabulous husband. A little break here to read Cooking Light and write on here.

Describe my personality. Uhmmmm no? I really don't like doing these things. I am scared what you will think, when I am not sure what I think. I am only 25 and fully aware that I have a lot to learn from God in my future years about who I am. But here is what I do know about my personality:

-I am fun when I choose to be
-I am grateful even though I don't always show it
-I am WAY TOO emotional
-I am confident, but can have that all shattered in a matter of minutes, only to feel better then next.
-I don't like change
-There are times when I am flighty
-Full of faith
-I am loud
-Guarded and selfish
-Lazy yet ambitious

So as you can see I don't even know who I am. That's okay I have learned more about my personality today then I knew yesterday, and I am guessing that trend will continue as long as God intends it to.

Day 17. Write about 3 things that make you happy.

Sun again! How blessed are we???

Quick health update....had my INR levels checked again today. They are up which is good! I go back again next Friday for another check. JESUS THANK YOU!

Quick running update....ran 4.5 miles yesterday and felt good. Almost normal. I had to stop a couple times but other then that I was running like I used to. Then when I was back home I took the stair 4 flights up, like I usually do, to our apartment. And for the first time in a month my legs ached before my lungs did and I didn't feel like I wanted to pass out at the top of the stairs! Praise JESUS!
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On to today's question....3 things that made me happy...

1. Jesus...plain and simple. Nothing brings more joy to my life then Him. I am, overcome with emotion that He would want to have a relationship with me. I simply can't thank Him enough for guiding me, loving me and ultimately dying for me. It pains me when I think about what my life without Him would look like.

2. Friends and family. I LOVE people. I mean I L.O.V.E people! I have the most amazing friends and family who I simply just do not see enough. I come alive when I am around them!

3. And because today is sunny for the second day in a row I will say putting on my sunglasses made me pretty gosh darn happy!

What makes you happy??

Day 16. Write a letter to your future daughter. Tell her what beauty means.

Hello sunshine! Look outside....quick! Hurry...look! SUN!!!! Its freak-frackin' freezing cold out, but yes people there is sun! Thank you Jesus for the sun. Can we please have more of it?

I am reading this amazing book for our small group. The chapter we read last was about prayer. As I read I was more and more aware of how I kind of suck at praying. I pray, trust me I do. But after reading this chapter it reminded me that I need to pray with pure motives, believing that it will actually be answered, be ready to thank Him for answered prayers and to do it continually. Like all the time. If you are mad, tell Him, He can handle it! If you are happy, He wants to share that with you. Sad, ditto. Hurting, even more. If you enjoy the sun, don't forget to thank Him for putting it there. I sometimes get caught in only requesting and praising and don't do enough just plain ole' conversation. I am committing to do more of that these days, confident that the Lord will reveal Himself more and more to me.

Running update! I tried to run yesterday and just didn't feel right. It was a run/crosstrain day so I decided to stop running and just walk hills in the treadmill. I will run again today hoping it goes better. Usually I would get upset or mad at myself but this time, not so much. I am so blessed to be able to run, so if it doesn't go well one day that's okay. What a concept!
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On to today's topic! Another letter...I really like letters! So here we go!

To my dearest future daughter,

I don't know you yet, I don't know who I will be when I meet you. I am not sure God's plan on when we get to meet. But let me tell you one thing, the day we get to meet will be the happiest day of my life. Sometimes I imagine you, and your sweet smile and gentle giggles. I also imagine you and I up at 3am and sick days home from work. But no matter what our days will look like I want you to know what true beauty is. True beauty is not the size on your jeans, it is not how straight your teeth are or the perfect color of your hair. True beauty is not what you see on a magazine cover or the latest trend. Nope, it just simply is not. And if the world continues like it is today, baby girl you will be in a fight against what the world thinks is beautiful. Beauty is what God designed. Beauty is following the Lord in whatever He has for your life. And oh I cannot wait to see the beauty that unfolds in that. Baby girl, you are beautiful because you are of the Lord's.

I don't even know you, not sure when I get to meet you, but I love you more then you will know.

Love,

Momma

Day 15. Write to encourage a friend. Inspire her beauty.

Running update....I ran 4.5 miles yesterday and only had to stop a couple times to catch my breath! I am coming back! I can feel it! :) I have never been so grateful to be able to run. I pray through the whole process usually. God is so faithful!

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Okay onto encouraging a friend! I am going to just write her a letter on her...if that's okay with you? If it's not...sorry I am doing it anyway. :)

To my dearest Pig,

I am supposed to be writing you a letter to encourage you! But this morning the tables were flipped and you were the one encouraging me. You are always there to pass on an encouraging word, to pray for me and to make sure I know that I am loved. You have been a friend when I least deserve it and have supported me in things you have no interest in. You are the definition of a friend and I have no idea what I would do without. Your love is never failing, even all the way from Montucky! You are such a clear vision of God. Your beauty radiates and anyone who knows you is better because of you. I simply just don't tell you enough how much I love you and how beautiful I think you are. I love you Piggy!

Day 14. Style 31. Post an outfit pic!

Running update! I ran 5 miles on Sunday with my JS. We both struggled a little and I had to stop and walk every mile or so, just so my lungs could return back to a normal state :), but other then that we did good! I run small miles for the next three days and then this weekend sometime we have a 7 miler. I am hoping it goes well. I feel bad sometimes because I feel like I am holding AA up, but he has been so encouraging and we are getting better at being running partners. For the 7 miler I am going to test out my new handheld water bottle so I will let you know how it goes.

Health update! I went in today for an INR check (PS...I am getting really good at getting my blood checked) and the doctor said no more shots!! WOOT WOOT! They are lowering my oral med level just a tad and we will see what my levels look like on Friday. I really like my doctor, so I trust her when she says I need to keep coming in. I am hoping that by this time next week the clots will be dissolved and I will be in "full" working order again. :)

Okay here is my outfit picture:

Boots (Target)

Tights (H&M)

Skirt (Forever21)

Tank (Target)

Black Cardi (Nord)

Necklace (Nord)

Belt (Forever21)

Happy love day! And days 12-13 of the Beauty Challenge!

Hmmm, love. A beautiful thing. The Jamaican Sprinter doesn't like Valentine's Day much, and I get it...shouldn't everyday be kind of like Valentine's day? But he appeased me and had a great surprise this morning of treats and flowers. I remember the minute I first saw him, and then the minute I saw him the second time. I remember a lot from the beginning of our relationship. I play it out in my head over and over again because they are such sweet memories that the Lord has helped me remember. There were really hard times in our dating life when I thought "we just aren't going to make it." But then I can clearly remember the day when that no longer was in my thought process. Times were still hard, but we were going to make it or I was going to die trying.

My JS, you are my best friend and the love of my life. Thank you for being caring, selfless, making me laugh and most importantly a servant of the Lord. You never cease to amaze me. You have proven that through better and worse, sickness and health that you are my man. Thank you for being my Jamaican Sprinter.

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Day 12. Write about what wears you out as a woman.

Where to start huh? I try not to think about what wears me out because it usually wears me out more. :) But I would say the one thing that wears me out is the people pleasing. I always try to make everyone around me happy and make sure their needs are met. I love doing this...I really do, but sometimes it gets overwhelming and there is a point when I feel like everything I do just isn't good enough for this person or that person.

The one thing that keeps me buoyant when I feel like I am sinking is that in all truth I have an audience of One. I have no one else I need to please but my Savior. He already knows I am broken and that is why He came to this earth to die for my sins. Jesus makes all things possible, even being a woman in this, at times, troubling world.

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Day 13. Write about something you would like to change about yourself for the better.

There are A LOT of things that I would change about myself, but because it is "love day" I have been thinking a lot about AA. The thing I would like to change is to minister better to him. I can put on a happy face and be joyful around others all day long but the minute that door shuts at home I can be an "angry monster", crying my eyes out or just down right rude. I don't want to be this. I really, really, really don't want to be like this. And I know what some of you are thinking, "thank goodness you have a man that you can do that in front of." And trust me I get it. But I want the best me to be available to him. I want to share Jesus' joy and love with him like I do with others. I have been praying through this a lot and the good news is that I can almost always realize and see when I am doing this. I am no longer doing this out of ignorance. The challenging news is that I need to fix the problem itself.